Foggy About Fog

If you think you've seen fog before, you're probably right.  The National Weather Service (NWS) defines fog as "water droplets suspended in the air at the Earth's surface."  Says Kenneth Curtley, spokesperson for the NWS: "If the air you're looking at matches that description, I'll be damned if you're not face-to-face with some fog." 

Dolphin Curse Words Finally Translated

"One shake of the flipper mid-air means suck it, while two wags of the beak translates roughly to fuck you," explains the revelatory new paper published in Marine Etymology this month.

Canoe Trip Falls Short

Canoeing enthusiast, Trey Marshall (33), stumbled on a waterfall--and lived to tell about it.  This past June, he and fellow outdoorsman Flip "Grizzly" Pyle (50) were canoeing on the Zambezi River when they felt the current picking up speed and heard "a loud roaring sound."  Before they had time to redirect their course, the two men found themselves plummeting down Victoria Falls.  Pyle and Marshall stood up to grip the edges of the canoe with white knuckles, attempting to remain in the upright position and bracing themselves for the impact of the 355 foot drop.  

When asked to relive the moments during which the two men were hurtling to their almost-certain deaths, Pyle briefly mentioned seeing snapshots of his life pass by.  He then shared: "I'll never forget what happened next--Trey tripped!"  

Marshall, whose impossible survival can only be explained as a miracle, reenacted the blunder: "I must have caught my foot on part of the canoe or something," he said, laughing heartily, "but I did, I totally lost my balance!"  Pyle, who also--incredibly--climbed out of the river unscathed, went on, giggling: "He was so embarrassed!  And I was just crackin' up, ya know?"  

After pretending to trip several times each, complete with sound effects like "Wh--wh--WHOOAA" and "I'm so CLUMSY!", the two agreed that the stumble was one for the ages and were only sorry it was not caught on camera for their other friends to see.

Amateur Fire-Eater's Last Spoken Words

Chihuahuas Smash World Record For Fastest Swim Across Atlantic While Dragging Middle-Aged Asian Woman

Dung Beetle Refills Ozone One Hole At A Time

Happiest Cities Struggle With Vulnerability

"It's hard," Rio de Janeiro shared with reporters, "I've been named the World's Happiest City by Forbes, and I host Carnaval, and this-that-and-the-other...but sometimes I just feel like I can't be myself.  Like it's all some big charade."  Sydney nodded emphatically before chiming in: "I don't always open up to others.  I think deep down I'm worried that they'll discover that I don't have it all-- that I'm not as happy as I seem."  Barcelona, who had remained silent for the majority of the discussion, awoke from a daze: "And that would be the WORST thing."

Irish Wolfhounds Acclimate to Life with Redhead

Bees' Boozing at O'Hare Chili's Postpones Connection Takeoff

Weather.com Releases Late-Century Presidential Hopefuls

This kid may have the popular vote, but Suri Cruise will give him a run for his money.