The famed collie who has been saving Timmy's from wells since the early 1950s has recently found herself out of work. What's taking her place? Zip codes.
"It was a sweet gig, but I knew it couldn't last forever," Lassie said, scratching what looked like a flea out of her scruff with her back leg. "Man doesn't need a best friend to warn him about noxious fumes or lurking copperheads when he has a zip code. And everyone has a zip code."
The collie continued: "I can't believe I'm saying this, but it's actually kind of a relief. There's a lot of pressure in being a hero." It is unclear how zip codes perform this warning function, but Lassie has faith that the numbers speak for themselves.
The collie is unsure where this new chapter in her life will lead her, but she maintains a positive outlook, characteristic of her breed. "The good news is: I could always just be someone's dog."
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